I’ve been going through a lot recently. My work life is so out of control that my personal life has taken a major hit. I won’t let this blog post get all somber like I did the last time, so that’s where I’ll leave it.
They say that the state of your house is a reflection of your mind. If you have either been to my dorm/my house/lived with me, you know exactly what this means for me. I’m also sorry about that, haha. I was diagnosed with ADD at a very early age, and I have never been able to be neat and tidy. Like, ever. And that’s weird, because I come from a neat family. There may have been points in my life where my room or my car would be clean for all of about two or three days. But then it was back to being a disaster. And it’s just always been like that for me, whether I was at peace with my life or if I was going through a low point (like I am now).
But there came a time about a month ago where I went down to my kitchen to cook some breakfast. I had just worked a 55-hour week. I was planning on using every minute of my well-earned weekend to rest and recuperate. Basically, I was going to do whatever the hell I wanted, which was to inevitably waste it all eating and watching Netflix. As soon as I finished, I placed my dishes in the sink to come back to later. It would be either a few hours or a few days. And I firmly told myself, “No. Just do your damn dishes.” I refused to let the state of my house continue to be a reflection of how out of control I felt about everything else.
So I did my dishes. And that led to wiping down the stove. Which led to cleaning out the fridge (like, taking out the shelves and Clorox-ing them). Then I wiped down every surface in the kitchen. After that I swept and mopped. And then I did my laundry. I also cleaned my living room. After about 4.5 hours, I had a completely clean downstairs. I took pictures and texted my whole family to make them proud. I invited my mom over for a small dinner party with Travis and me. And I went to bed that night exhausted in a whole new way. I felt accomplished and proud of all the work I just did.
This post isn’t going to dive too deep into depression management (as I am not a mental health professional). But, to any of my readers out there who may be struggling with something in your personal life, there’s always a way to conquer it. Even if you can’t fix the actual problem at the moment, something else in your life can be. For me, I can’t fix what’s out of control in my life, but I can do my dishes and clean my house. It might not seem like a lot, but it’s a lot to me (and it’s definitely my mom’s dream come true). Mom, this one’s for you!